boot camp

Insecurities

“Accept everything about yourself – I mean everything, You are you and that is the beginning and the end – no apologies, no regrets.”

Clark Moustakas

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****DISCLAIMER****

This blog is directed at the female population, not because I don’t believe men also suffer from insecurities (or because I don’t care that they do), but because it was in honor of Intentional Women’s Day.  As such, I wanted a post something to make women feel empowered.  It was not in an effort to make any of my male counterparts feel slighted, and I do genuinely appreciate all the gentlemen who stepped up to comment!  If you are a man and you happen to be reading this, I do believe the core message here still applies to you, so feel free to substitute “man” for “woman” and “handsome”, “hot”, “sexy” or whatever other term you’d prefer for beautiful. Ultimately, I believe EVERYONE: man or woman deserves to be happy, and that starts with loving and accepting yourself.  

I started this post yesterday in honor of International Women’s Day.  I thought it would be a topic we could all relate to, and a nice break from discussing my daily workouts.  Apparently, I was not the only one with this idea because when I pulled up Facebook this morning, there was a bunch of other chatter about this very issue. 🙂

We all have them.  It doesn’t matter if you’re a size 2, 10, or 20- if you’re a super athlete or super model- there are things you are going to feel self conscious about.  Sometimes it’s things you can change like your waste line or thighs; and sometimes it’s something your stuck with (unless you opt for surgery…) like stretch marks, loose skin, or even a less than perfect nose.

I’m not sure why as a society we tend to value the appearance of beauty more than beautiful character (and diversity!), but it’s clearly something that impacts all of us.  I’ve never been a “pretty, girly girl”, but I do have a lot of personality.  I am also caring, warm, compassionate, and have a big heart.  As you can imagine, I’m not the lady getting the most attention from the opposite sex.  At least, not at first glance.  I’m one of those people who becomes more attractive the more you get to know me, and I’m okay with that.  Of course, that doesn’t mean that when I go out with all my gorgeous friends that I don’t get self conscious.  As much as I appreciate being the girl with the personality and not the killer looks, it can still be difficult- at times– to live in a society where the latter is more prized.  After all, everyone wants to feel sexy and beautiful every now and then.

That is where working out comes in for me.  While I can’t go out and make myself as stunning as some other women (ok maybe I could, but it would be extremely expensive and likely violate my low maintenance nature), I can work hard at being the best version of myself.  That means making myself as fit and strong- mentally and physically- as possible.  Working out can boost your confidence and give you more energy to conquer your day.  Let’s face it, endorphins make you feel good in the moment, and getting results will make that feeling last.  Plus, THERE IS NOTHING MORE BEAUTIFUL OR SEXY THAN A WOMAN WITH CONFIDENCE- ESPECIALLY WHEN SHE TAKES CARE OF HER BODY.  Go get that PR you’ve been working on and then tell me you don’t feel good about yourself.

All that being said, even a person like me- who works out like a nut– can still have body image issues.  Even getting in great shape won’t take away all your insecurities.  For example, when I was training for the marathon and lost weight no matter what I ate, there were still days I felt fat (stupid hormones!).  The image of myself in the mirror was dramatically affected by my mental image of myself, and it wasn’t until Adam took pictures out on the boat one day that I realized just how thin I had gotten.  I immediately asked him “Why didn’t you tell me I looked like I needed to eat something!?”

Even now,  I sometimes have a hard time adapting to a more muscular build than I am used to.  Runners normally have very lean muscles, but since I started doing so much cross training, my calves and quads have gotten huge (not really huge- ok maybe my thighs are huge. And my butt! lol).  I know in my head that I am still thin.  I fit in a size 2 for Pete’s sake!  But, it’s something I have to remind myself of on a regular basis when I look in the mirror and see a “stockier” version of myself than I am used to seeing.

I also remind myself that I am a STRONGER version of myself than I used to be, and THAT is well worth the trade off.  The truth is that the more I strength train and run, the more my muscles will become lean and stronger.  Besides, there is nothing wrong with the way I look now.  Every time I feel that urge to pick myself apart I remind myself: 1) I have WORKED HARD for this body.  I earned every muscle through sweat and determination. 2) This body has carried me through a Tough Mudder, a marathon, several half marathons, hundreds and hundreds of miles of training runs, and numerous insane workouts (with minimal injury!).  It is strong, and THAT is beautiful. 3) My body is a work in progress.  It doesn’t need to be perfect.  My flaws are part of me and I like who I am.

Every woman is beautiful.  No matter what shape, size, race, or background.  No matter where you are in your journey:  YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.  Your flaws are part of what make you, and you are exactly the way you were meant to be.   Perfect is boring and unoriginal.  WORK WITH WHAT YOU’VE GOT.   Everyone has insecurities no matter how perfect or put together they seem.  Not everyone makes the choice to get over them.

I spent over 5 years of my life with a person who picked me apart on a daily basis, pointed out every flaw, and continually tried to convince me that “[I] make everyone around [me] miserable”.  It took a LONG time to let go of any lingering belief that it was true- especially the last part, but I did and life is better now than it ever was before.  If I could learn to love and accept myself again- after all of that– then there’s no reason you can’t too.  No one has the right to pick you apart- including you!  You deserve better than that!

LOVE YOURSELF!

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Bad Ass Boot Camp and Weekend Recap

“Success is a marathon, not a sprint.”

~Unknown

(It’s a good thing too cause I suck at sprinting!)

Where to start!!! I’m a little behind in the blogging department, but it’s only because life has been crazy busy (with all good things!).  I am happy to report that I am finally operating at 100% capacity, and it’s lucky because it is 65 degrees out and sunny!

Looking so bad ass in my socks for boot camp!

Saturday we had an AWESOME boot camp session, which I have affectionately dubbed “Bad Ass Boot Camp”.  I had found these bad ass socks online (through some of my Facebook/blog buddies) and got a pair not only for myself, but also two of my favorite boot camp ladies.  We all decided to wear them to boot camp together and it was definitely beast mode on!

The workout consists of 5 min stations consisting of deadlift, clean and press, body saws, burpess, alternating toe touches, treadmill, and pushups.  I deadlifted 95 lbs over 60 times in the allotted time AND managed over 100 pushups on my last station. That was more than Adam, but he insists his form was better. I ran further than him and did more burpees too…just for the record!  I also pointed out to him that I was lifting a higher percentage of my body weight than him (mostly because he has been slacking off with the gym lately, and I was hoping to light a fire under his you-know-what… mission accomplished 😉 )

I was SO ECSTATIC about completing that workout- particularly the pushups (I made this clear to Mike by putting a big smiley face on my paper next to the total and drawing stars around it).  I used to really struggle with real pushups.  When I first started boot camp I could barely do one!  Now I hammer them out like it’s no big deal.  It’s exactly what I remind myself whenever I struggle with another exercise- LIKE PULL-UPS!

Conquering the handstand pushup!

 Sunday, we followed up our kick ass boot camp session with some indoor rock climbing.  Adam and I invited some of our boot camp buddies and his best friend to come too.  We had a pretty good turn out and everyone totally rocked it.  I was pretty impressed with how well everyone climbed, but not really surprised considering what kind of shape everyone is in.

While we were there I managed to knock out 3 (and a half) handstand pushups, which was a major achievement (at least in my mind) because I had done some serious upper body lifting earlier that morning to train for my pull-ups!

I was especially excited to see my girl Kelly kicking butt because she was a little nervous about it at first.  It wasn’t long before she was killing it though.  It was definitely a nice change to add some new people.  Plus, it will be fun to have more of a crowd in the future.  Going in a group added a whole new level of fun (and entertainment).  It also helped everyone push just a little bit harder. 😉

Tonight I’m looking forward to getting back to boot camp.  I already did my Insanity workout this morning, and am thinking about running to the gym to do my pull-up weight training.  I hope everyone is having a great day!

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Holy Hip Flexors!

“I’m smiling because I love it.”

Shaun T.

Story of my life!

Holy shoulders! Holy hurt!

The good news is month one of Insanity is done.  The bad news is (and let’s be truthful- no one is actually surprised here) “RECOVERY” week has started, and there are still level 1 drills (BOOOO!).  My trainer had warned me that the recovery week was no joke.  It was filled with a lot of torture as promised, but still totally doable.

To be honest, I was really looking forward to the new workout this morning for 2 reasons. 1) I was getting REALLY BORED with repeating the other workouts day in and out (now I get the same one for another 5 days straight…wooohooo!). 2) I needed the stretching after hitting the gym yesterday.

It won't kill you. I promise. No one has ever died of pain.

Plus, I as much as I hate it at times (like when I’m doing it)- I still LOVE IT (yes, even the level 1 drills).  It’s the best substitute I have for missing boot camp, and even if it isn’t quite as challenging as the the torture Mike inflicts, it’s still a really good workout and a great way to start the day.

The other bad news is I am not as 100% as I originally thought yesterday. lol  Our group training session totally kicked my butt, and it wasn’t even that hard.  Not that it wasn’t hard, but there were a few exercises I don’t normally struggle with that were really difficult for me.  For example, usually on ball-to-wall (you squat and then throw a medicine ball up at the wall and repeat) I use the heavy ball and crank them out, but last night I had a lighter one and I still felt fatigued.  I even struggled with the jump rope!

Damn straight!

Admittedly, doing Insanity in the morning, and lifting to train for my pull-ups immediately beforehand probably affected my performance some; but I was dragging WAY MORE than usual.  I hate that feeling- especially because I know it means I should probably back off some until I really am back at 100%.  On a side note I still totally kicked ass on the box jumps and killed my previous PR on the tall box. 🙂

I don’t know why I am so impatient when it comes to exercise.  I hate when I don’t feel like I’m making progress, even maintaining isn’t enough for me.  I have this little fire burning inside that is always driving me to push harder, get stronger, jump higher, move faster, and conquer the next challenge.  Why? Because making those strides is empowering and the feeling is addictive.  I honestly don’t care as much about my physical appearance as I do about ability.  When I demolish a hard workout, I truly feel like I can do anything.  It is the best high there is- completely intoxicating.  It also an amazing outlet and the most effective treatment for my anxiety/PTSD I’ve found yet.

I don’t expect everyone to understand my relationship with fitness.  In fact, most people won’t, and that’s okay with me.  I have my boot camp family and enough people in my life who get it not to be concerned with the ones who don’t. 🙂

Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you can’t do something or stand in the way of your dreams.  If something is important to you, just go for it and forget what anyone else has to say about it.  The only person who can ever stand in your way is you.  You are as unstoppable as you choose to be.  Go out and conquer your goals- whether it’s a marathon or a jog around the block.  Everyone has to start somewhere.  If you commit and believe, you WILL SUCCEED.

Another great one from Motivation,Hope,Strength. Be sure to check out their Facebook page!

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If You’re Happy and You Know It…

“Think big, believe big, act big, and the results will be big.”

Raise your hand! 🙂

I bet you can guess why I’m so happy today!  That’s right!!! I got to workout this morning!!! I was pushing hard, exploding with power, and jumping leaping all the way through the LAST Insanity workout of month one– without feeling like I was going to die. BONUS!!!  Okay, maybe not through the WHOLE thing, but that’s only cause basketball/level 1 drills suck royally.  (I was extremely grateful to say goodbye to that specific workout of month 1 ;))

Anyway, the good news is my body cooperated.  I’m so glad we are finally on the same page again.  This makes me feel completely prepared to go to the group training session today.  It has been WAY TOO LONG since I’ve had a tough workout with Mike and my boot camp peeps.  I was completely bummed to miss SNOW DAY boot camp Wednesday night, but I knew it wasn’t a good idea when I actually had to pause the Insanity workout and dragged my way through it that morning. However, now that I’m all mended I am totally ready to ROCK IT tonight.

I have been withdrawing from exercise BIG TIME! I HATE when I can’t workout.  My eye was twitching the ENTIRE time I was sick.  I had no alternative form of stress reduction.  Alright, I admit I cheated a little and did some pull-up training on occasion.  This morning, though, for the first time in several days I was FINALLY able to work out at full capacity, and voila! Eye twitch extinguished!

I’m not sure what Mike has in store for us tonight, but I AM READY!!!! I think I may even see how high I can jump next to the tall box with the small one on top of it since I am completely determined to get up there at some point! 🙂

Happy Friday Everyone!!!! I hope you get your weekend started right!

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Dear Mr. “X”

“I am Woman. Hear me Roar”

I am sorry about the profanity, but the censored version wouldn’t load

Dear Mr. “X”,

I don’t know you, but I know I don’t like you.  I have a serious problem with the way you’re treating my friend.  You may think you can break her, but you have truly underestimated the woman you’re dealing with.  Maybe it’s because you never took the time to love or know her as a husband should.  Let me just enlighten you, that girl has more strength and character in her little toe than you’ll ever have in your life.  Tell me, exactly what kind of man spends his time trying to tear down the mother of his child?  What kind of miserable person wastes his own life trying to destroy someone else’s?

You may think you can convince the world with your lying and manipulation, but I am on to your games.  You abusers all study from the same handbook; not one of you ever has anything original to say.  You spend your time telling your target she is crazy, unlovable, selfish, unattractive, and a terrible mother.  The list goes on and on.  You try to convince her she’s isolated and cut off her support system.  You make her feel like her problems are a burden to other people.  You attempt to tear everything that makes her happy out of her life. You know how to play the victim card, how to fein concern, and how to strike for the jugular once her guard is down. This time, however, in your case, it isn’t going to work.

You won’t convince her she’s crazy because she has too many people who care about her to show her the truth.  Plus, thanks to your insistence on having her head examined she now a psychologist to back up the fact that YOU- NOT HER are the problem.  YOU are the crazy one.  YOU are the weak one.  YOU are the one who needs therapy.  Strong men don’t chip away other peoples’ self esteem.  Cowards lacking any self esteem of their own do… BULLIES do.  You are a coward and a bully, and I can’t stand either. 

You won’t convince her she is unlovable because I LOVE HER, and I tell her everyday.  I will continue to tell her everyday until she’s tired of hearing it.  That girl is like a sister to me.  I know exactly what she is going through.  I know WHAT YOU ARE PUTTING HER THROUGH.  For every insult you utter in her direction I will offer 100 words of encouragement.  THAT is kind of treatment she deserves.  Guess what else… I’m not the only one behind her.  She has a MULTITUDE of people who genuinely love her without conditions or criticism- a kind of love you can’t comprehend.  We will continue to love her no matter what you do.

You may try to convince both her and yourself of how worthless she is, but everyone who meets her loves her.  She has a gift for touching people.  She is capable of compassion you’ll never understand.  She is not someone you meet and forget.  That girl has star quality, and she SHINES IN SPITE OF YOU.  She is handling the most difficult situations (that’s right- plural) a person can face in her life-  ALL AT THE SAME TIME and still manages each day with more strength, determination, grace, and optimism than you could ever imagine.  You ARE TOO BLIND TO SEE IT.  That girl is NEVER bitter.  If there was ever a person who had a right to be angry at the world it is her, but instead she is CARING, GIVING, and LOVING.  THAT IS WHY WE LOVE HER.  That is why we ADMIRE her.  She may think we lift her up, but it is she who lifts us up on a regular basis.

That is NOT the behavior of a selfish person.  She doesn’t have a mean or selfish bone in her body.  Making her health a priority is not selfish.  Going after her goals in life is not selfish.  Wanting to be the best person she can be, to be the best mom she can be is not selfish.  HOW DARE YOU TRY TO MANIPULATE HER INTO FEELING GUILTY FOR TRYING TO BE HAPPY.  It’s bad enough that you are completely incapable of being EVEN REMOTELY SUPPORTIVE.  To be MEAN and SPITEFUL enough to call a woman a bad mother FOR EXERCISING and EATING HEALTHY is down right inexcusable.  What gives you the right, please tell me?  Are you so threatened that you can’t stand the sight of her getting stronger?  Are you so demasculinated by the fact THAT SHE CAN NOT ONLY SURVIVE WITHOUT YOU, BUT BE HAPPIER WITHOUT YOU that you have to threaten to take away the one thing that matters to her most?  You need to attempt to take her child from her simply to get even and make her miserable?  A child you don’t even have the slightest idea how to care for, seriously?  The fact that you would even consider tearing your daughter away from the person who loves her most, that she is most closely bonded to proves in itself what a flat out TERRIBLE PARENT YOU ARE.

That is the mother of your child and SHE DESERVES YOUR RESPECT.  She is a beautiful person inside and out.  You were LUCKY to have ever gotten her at all. You knew she was too good for you and were afraid of her realizing it, so you tried to tear her down to your level.  But it didn’t work because despite all the garbage you tried to fill her head with, that girl still knows her self worth.  Even if she doesn’t believe it 100% to the core yet, she will.  You’re hold over her gets weaker everyday as she makes further steps to improve her life.  She went and got healthy and it pissed you off.  How dare she be happy when she has so much to fall apart over.  I’m sure it just eats away at someone like you who could have the world on a plate and still manage to be miserable.

You can’t cut off her support system or keep her from the people who care about her.  WE WON’T LET YOU.  There are too many of us who love her way too much to ever let you get in the way.  You have grossly underestimated your ability to control her.  You can’t manipulate everyone into seeing her in the twisted light you do.  We aren’t blind.  We can see her for who she truly is.  It’s too bad you are too busy seeing your own flaws in her to appreciate it yourself.  While you’re still finding reasons to blame others for your problems, THAT GIRL IS GOING TO CONQUER THE WORLD.  She will succeed IN SPITE OF YOU and BE STRONGER FOR HAVING GONE THROUGH IT.  You just keep it coming because it’s all fuel to keep her pushing forward toward success and happiness.  It won’t be long before she leaves you in the dust.

Sincerely,

Jenny

PS. These shirts are actually available for purchase. I just may get her one!

Why I Love (and sometimes hate) My Trainer

“Dedication and commitment are what transfer dreams into realities.”

-Unknown

I never thought I could afford to work with a trainer.  I always thought it’d be really expensive.  Then I joined boot camp and met the instructor Mike.  Initially, I had my doubts.  He seemed kind of angry and yelled a lot.  That was before I got to know him.  The truth is that Mike is one of the most dedicated and committed people I have ever met- and not just in terms of training (and, yes, he still yells a lot- but he’s also the first person to give you a high five fist bump and tell you when you’ve nailed it).  He takes his role as a boot camp instructor and personal trainer very personally.  He truly wants his clients to succeed, and is always willing to go that extra mile to make it happen.

Case in point, our boot camp class is supposed to be an hour long; however, it typically runs at least an extra 15 min if not longer. Why? Because Mike stays until everyone is finished.  At boot camp we don’t finish when we are tired, we finish when we’re done (whether it’s late or not!).  His group training sessions are no different.  The last one Adam and I did ran almost an hour over (that’s double the length) and Mike did the whole workout with us (after his workout on the stair climber with a weighted vest…he still kicked our butts- hate him! jk).  I have personally even seen him stay late to give someone that extra push to meet a goal when he stayed an extra hour after group one night to help a client conquer her fear of the tall box.

I am GOING TO OWN YOU EVIL PULL-UP BAR!!!

This past month, Mike made everyone at boot camp come up with a goal, which basically turned my 2012 goal of doing a pull-up into my February 2012 goal.  The problem: my lats refuse to cooperate on this one!  I bought a pull-up bar and hung it in the guest room door way (right by the bathroom, so I have to walk by it 50+ times a day) and have been doing negative pull-ups like it’s my job.  So far, the only thing I have to show for it so far is some really sore muscles and the feeling that my shoulders are going to fall off.  Meanwhile, everyone else has been annilating their goals.  As ecstatic as I am for them, it’s making me feel like a total loser.

I know it’s not right to compare and that the part that really matters is I’m putting in a lot of effort.  However, I’m someone who pushes myself to the limit on my own so having this deadline is only making me frustrated.  Most of the time, I really appreciate Mike pushing me hard, but in this case I am pretty much hating him for it (not all the time…just when I look at that damn pull-up bar).  While I am POSITIVE I will get to the point of doing a pull-up, I’m a little doubtful it’s going to happen in the next week- and THAT is going to make me feel like a total failure until I make it.  The worst part is I just had an awesome run yesterday and I have knocked out 3 wks of Insanity, but all I can think about is that stupid pull-up!  It’s going to be the bane of my existence until I get up there.

Of course, despite all my drama with the pull-ups I really do love training with Mike (and the rest of the boot camp crew!).  They have really become a second family to me and have helped me grow as a person.  When I first started boot camp and training with Mike I went into every workout anxious about whether I would make it through (despite being in shape enough to run over 15 miles).  Over time I got to the point of approaching the workouts with the attitude of “I can get through this”.  Now my attitude is always “BRING IT ON!”

Working out with Mike is always a challenge.  His boot camp classes have been tough enough to make Insanity seem easy in comparison.  Making it through his group sessions and boot camp have made me feel like I can truly conquer anything- including pull-ups!

I don’t know that I would have made to the point of being this tough (mentally and physically) if I had not signed up for that first month of boot camp.  Running a marathon was a challenge, and it without a doubt changed my life.  Yet, it doesn’t even begin to compare with what working out with Mike and my boot camp family has done for me.  Running is a solitary sport- it’s just you and the distance you need to conquer.  There’s no peers for support and no one to push you other than yourself.  It’s great for building discipline and character, but it can only take you so far.  Having the support of other people to push and motivate you is what makes the difference.  It’s what makes a workout that would otherwise seem insurmountable seem doable.  At the core of that workout support for me is Mike.

Today I started week 4 of Insanity…and did some more negative pull-ups.  I’m not sure what the rest of the day has in store for me, but it might just include a run to the gym. 🙂

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What a Difference A Year Makes!

“Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It’s a mental attitude. It comes from appreciating what we have, instead of being miserable about what we don’t have.

It’s so simple, yet so hard for the human mind to comprehend.”

-Bits and Pieces 

Today I turn 29.  It’s officially the last year of my twenties.  While many people (especially women) dread turning another year older, I find myself approaching the big 3-0 with the opposite sentiment.  Why? Because life just keeps getting better, and I can’t to see what this next year has in store for me.

Originally, I had anticipated celebrating by going out today; but instead find myself just enjoying the morning at home.  I don’t need any flash or glam today.  I don’t need anything.  It is the most wonderful feeling of contentment- something I don’t think I ever knew how to be until recently (especially sitting still). lol  I guess some things get easier with age. 😉

My Birthday card from my brother and his girlfriend. They know me so well.

I think a large part of how amazing today feels comes from how low things were a year ago (and the year before).  I have had to rebuild my life from the ground up, and along the way I rebuilt myself.  I am stronger, fitter, more self aware and self assured, and all around healthier.  Life is good again.  In fact, it’s better than ever.  I’m better than ever.  A year ago (even 6 months ago), I was still keeping people at arms length.  Now, I can can finally let my guard down and allow people to see the real me.

Borrowed from my girl Kelly

I don’t worry about other people hurting me anymore because I am so much more confident and secure in who I am.  I know I can take the best of what they can dish out.  No person is strong enough to break me. I can handle life’s knocks.  If I get knocked down, you can be sure I’ll get right back up.  It’s going to take more than some harsh words or bumps in the road to break my stride at this point in my life. I have a solid foundation now.  I have a tight support system, and an army of people who LOVE and ACCEPT me FOR ME.

I opened my heart to the world again, and got it completely filled in return. I am SO BLESSED to have as many wonderful people in my life as I do- and I truly appreciate each and every one!  My phone has been ringing off the hook all morning with Facebook alerts and birthday well wishes.  It’s overwhelming at times just how much love and support I have in my life now.  I never thought I would have so many genuine friendships.  The thought of spending time with a lot of people used to exhaust me (or incite anxiety), however, now I’m often impressed at just how easy it is to maintain a great number of relationships when they are healthy and genuine.

All of the hurt, anxiety, and misery I endured makes everything about life so much sweeter now.  I wouldn’t wish what I went through on anyone, but I also wouldn’t change it.  It made me who I am today.  It brought me to where I am- and I like where I’m at.  29 is going to be a great year for me because I’m determined to live it up.  I am going into my thirties with a bang!

Happiness comes from developing a healthy relationship with yourself. Like any relationship, it takes work.  There will be ups and downs.  There will be times when you will be fed up; but at the end of the day it’ll be worth it.  I have made a commitment to be happy.  No one can do it for me.  I make a conscious effort at it everyday.  Today, that effort will include my next Insanity workout and spending time with the people who matter most to me. 🙂

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Dig Deeper!

“If you always put limit on everything you do- physical or anything else- it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there. You must go beyond them.”

-Bruce Lee

Amen!

Oh yeah, I pulled out the Bruce Lee today.  Maybe I was inspired by my new self defense lessons.  Speaking of which, maybe I’ll start adding a self defense move of the week you tube video with my posts so everyone can learn how to kick ass with me…  

Today I worked my second 13 + hr shift this week and came home exhausted (saving lives is hard work 😉 )  I considered going straight to bed, but decided to “dig deeper” and do my scheduled Insanity workout instead.  On the agenda today: pure cardio and abs.  I did the abs first because I didn’t realize initially that they were separate workouts.   Anyway, the ab workout was only an additional 15ish minutes, so even combined with the full cardio workout, it was not as bad or long as boot camp.  Tomorrow is supposed to be a rest day, but since I’m a couple days behind I think I’m going to skip ahead to the fit test and possibly the next workout.

Plus, TOMORROW IS BOOT CAMP 🙂 YEA!!!!!!  Can you tell I’m REALLY looking forward to it?  Is it still sadistic to look forward to torture and pain when you know it’s good for you?  In reality, it’s not really boot camp I get excited about- it’s SURVIVING another boot camp and the associated post workout high (not to mention hanging out with my awesome “other family”!)  

So here’s to rising above plateaus, digging deeper, and being the person you are meant to be!

In the words of Caption Planet :The Power is Yours!"

So, for anyone interested… here is one of the useful moves Adam taught me called the “Rolling Knee Bar” (or “How to Break the Bad Guy’s Knee”).  Enjoy!

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Conquering Fear and Establishing Goals

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”

-Dale Carnegie

Lots of stuff going on recently.  Where to start…

Friday I was totally stoked to fit a group training session in with Mike and a bunch of awesome boot camp peeps.  Because it was all people from boot camp and not his regular clients, he pushed us extra hard (HELL YES! BRING IT ON!).  I was initially relieved that it was primarily upper body because my legs were shot.  Once we got started, though, I realized my arms were also useless (I think Insanity may be catching up with me). lol  Nonetheless, it was an AWESOME workout.  We were all DYING.  The warm up consisted of over 10 minutes on the stairclimber (Mike style- no holding on allowed!) for Adam and I.  Everyone else had to run a mile; I wanted to trade.  The rest consisted of stations various types of upper body torture mixed with lunges and box jumps.  The first round was 1 min at each station, then 1:15 for round 2, and 1:30 for round 3.

And box jumps! No more medium box for us!

It was the first workout that I felt like I really conquered the evil tall box!  Normally, I end up staring at it more time than jumping on it because- let’s face it- that thing is almost at my waste. However, this time I destroyed that box!  (That’s right box! I owned you!!!) On our last 1:30 min set, I got up 19 times despite interference from all the guys rudely trying to get into their locker room behind me.  Even more exciting, Kelly (the superwoman and blogger I’ve mentioned in my previous posts) finally conquered her fear of the tall box- despite getting bit a few times– and got up on it for her first time!!!!! We all knew she could do it, and now she does too!  It was personal victories all around as another member of our group had successfully completed her first nonstop mile.  Of course, that just how we roll at boot camp- smashing barriers everyday.

After our workout, I shared with Mike my new goal of doing a pull-up, and he quickly pulled over a box and showed me how to do an exercise to “wake up” my lats.  Basically, I used to box to jump and then pull myself into the pull-up position.  Once up, I had to resist coming back down to recruit the proper muscle groups.  I already practiced some more today and am super pumped about potentially being one of only a few women at the gym able to one unassisted. 🙂

In other exciting news, Adam has started teaching me how to properly throw a punch in addition to some self defense techniques.  Being such a tiny person, you never know when skills (or should I say “skillz“) like that may come in handy.  It’s something I have been wanting to for a while, and now I just happen to know an instructor (and Marine trained “deadly weapon”). Plus, being a woman (and domestic abuse survivor) it’s certainly something I’d encourage to feel empowered.  Who knows, maybe by the end of this I’ll be Marine Corps tough.

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Why Boot camp and Decongestants Don’t Mix…

“If you are hurt, whether in mind or body, don’t nurse your bruises.

Get up and light-heartedly, courageously, good temperedly get ready for the next encounter

This is the only way to take life”

– Emily Post

Ok so this post is a little late.  Normally I don’t post twice in the same day, but this workout was entirely blog-post-worthy (and I found a bunch of great pics to use). lol

Wednesday night I went to boot camp (yes after my Insanity workout that morning-despite being sick).  I knew it would be a tough workout, but figured I could muddle through it.  I HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WAS IN FOR!  I keep telling Mike that the Insanity workouts are not as hard as boot camp.  Apparently he got the signals crossed and decided boot camp was too easy.  He KILLED US.

unless you pass out, then you're screwed...

Now, let me tell you why boot camp and decongestants don’t mix.  I have been taking pseudoephed (possibly pharmacy’s greatest gift to mankind) for the past few days in an attempt to relieve the intense pressure in my sinuses and help fight this God-forsaken bug.  What I didn’t realize prior to heading to our session, was that Mike had beyond insane (because let’s face it, Insanity isn’t that hard) interval training in mind.  The problem: the point of interval training is to adequately recover in between.  That means getting your heart rate down.  Side effects of pseudoephedrine: tachycardia, palpitations, dizziness, and blurry vision (ie. boot camp and decongestants don’t mix).

I can’t tell you exactly what exercises we did (because it’s sort of a dizzy, fuzzy blur!).  The warm up was pretty much the same as Insanity.  As for the rest, all I can say is there was a lot of jumping, punching, and push-ups involved.  There was also a lot of yelling to “PUSH HARDER!!!“.  I kept my eyes closed for most of it in a desperate effort to stop the room from spinning.  Every time Mike told me to move faster and “run it out” and wanted you yell “Are you serious?! This IS as fast as I can go right now! I’m happy to still be upright!”  It was honestly the closest I’ve come to passing out since the first session.  Someone actually threw up (I think a first while I’ve been there), and a few people had to stop at various points.  I think there would have probably been a lot of swearing and complaining if any of us had breath to spare.

I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, and it wasn’t in a good way.  When I did fleetingly open my eyes to glance around the room, it pretty much looked like a bunch of zombies.  Mike asked how I was liking the workout, and I told him I couldn’t wait to get back to my “easy Insanity workout”.  It was true.  His workout made Insanity look like kindergarten recess.  Every time I tried to move faster, I would get dizzy and have palpitations.  There were a couple points when I was really sorry I came (especially being sick), but by the time it was finally over I snapped out of it.  After all, I was happy to at least be suffering in good company. 🙂

 After that crazy workout, I took a day off from exercise and went to bed early last night instead.  I definitely needed that extra rest.  This morning I was back to my Insanity workout, and tonight I’m hoping to make a group session at the gym with Mike where I will be getting my sexy face on with some fabulous ladies- because there’s nothing sexier than a girl who knows her way around the weight room.

PS. Anyone looking for a little daily inspiration, here a a few of my new favorite Facebook sites.  They all have great inspirational photos and great tips on living a fit/healthy lifestyle.  If anyone has any other sites or blogs they recommend, I’d love to hear about them.

Kendrick Fitness

ShaBAM Fitness

Fit and Fiesty

The Optimism Revolution

Healthy Body Project

Oh and just in case anyone in my awesome family is still looking for a last minute birthday present (we’re getting down to the wire people) feel free to pick up any of the kick ass apparel on this site.

Have an amazing day everyone!!!!!

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